Week 11 – Reviewing your work


For this week I decided that it would be best if I tackled the second issue first. Simply pointing out errors and typos in the structure of the article that I’m going to be attempting to review most likely wouldn’t make for a particularly engaging read. Of note though, the tense is sometimes off which can be confusing, and there’s not any particular focus on the W H style of writing or even keeping details to a minimum (the suggested route with stories dealing with stories relating to self-harm).

In regards to if it meets the criteria given out by the site linked in this week’s blog activity, it’s a mixed bag. It doesn’t feature suicide as a headline title for example, which is noted to potentially draw in people considering it as an option. And it doesn’t feature any graphic images of the victim in question, again something that’s noted as being advisable.

In terms of criticism though, the article certainly doesn’t shy away from mentioning specific details or mincing words on what happened. It also doesn’t attempt to go into the more positive outlooks on this event (using any of the methods suggested by the linked article, for instance) but this is more acceptable due to the it’s nature as essentially an info dump. There’s also the implication that the victim’s self-harm essentially just amounted to one big inconvenience to passersby, which could be seen as offensive to readers.


Tragedy strikes today as a woman was left injured after she was caught under a train at a Railway station in Brisbane.

The woman, believed to be in her thirties, received assistance from emergency services and was rushed to the hospital in serious condition.

She sustained damage to her lower legs, but thankfully remained conscious and was able to be given medical assistance at mid day.

The event was witnessed by the train full of people that she happened to be on.

Quiz Results

This week’s quiz went quite poorly; I was exceptionally worn out after getting ready to move houses and ended up failing almost all the questions (3/10!). Thankfully, after repeating it I managed to score much higher, at a respectable 9/10.


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